creating chaos and uproar wherever she went. Divorced as many times as she married, she leaves only good wishes behind.

I never imagined i'd fall back into that trap again after a previous broken heart the last thing i wanted was for it to be taken away by someone else.. It has been so long since i last felt like this actually it was even more.. i actually felt like i meant something for someone and that for once he just might be genuine and not just want to get in my pants..

i never thought i'd fall for you.. Even though i still remember when we first met, not for one second would i have thought you were attracted to me .. plus you are one of my besties brother.. I had no intention to fall for you as i was scared to cross that barrier i didnt want any awkwardness so i tried to keep away.. but it was hard to avoid you and hard to keep away as you have all the good qualities i couldnt resist..

That nite we first spent together.. i knew i could rest my head on this chest forever, your warmness, your touch, your kiss, your voice, you arms wrapped around me like you never want to let go.. my heart tried so hard not to get attached but if you could hear how strongly it beats for you you'd understand my feelings..

i however tried to forget and tried to keep it all to myself.. because i was scared of losing a friend and i was scared it meant nothing to you..

The day you told me you wished i could have been your girlfriend and show me off to the world, my heart melted and i wished we could both just forget everything and be together, inside i was begging to stop all those kind words, i wanted yu to stopbecause i knew what was the point.. but at the same time i couldnt stop you because i liked what you were saying .. It made me realise that there are still nice charmig guys out there who do care about women..

Since thn only wanted to be with you, to hold on to you tight and never let go.. i wanted to kiss you until we were both out of breath, i wanted to tell the world that i wanted only you and nothing else..

It all happened so quickly im not even sure what happens next.. because you are so far from me now.. but the only guy i can think of is you.. No other guy matters more to me.. i dont even look at anyone else.. i dont even care about anything other than you.. i spend my day thiking of the little time we had and how i have fallen for you.. how much i want a cuddle at nite now but you are not there.. i miss your warmness.. you were my human radiator.. i wish i could be with you day and nite .. if it was up to me id be on the first plane to uk just to be with you.. you've touched my heart like no other person did.. but now your not here

Hold on tight to things that mean so much to you.. cherish all the good moment and all the good memories.. savour the time you have with your loved one and show them your affection for them coz a time might come when you have to say good bye and then all you'll have are those memories..and nothing else ..

I might be miserable now.. i cant eat well, i cant sleep well, the first thing i think about is him, the only person i want to talk to is him.. i sometimes have to cry myself to sleep and wake up in the morning wondering is he thinking of me.. but i wouldnt change anything even if it hurts because it felt good and it felt rite.. and i have faith that if we are meant to be with each other we will meet again..

life does bring you unexpected surprises.. and usually when things gets good there is something that comes and detroys the goodness so that you suffer a bit.. i've leant that and it makes me the person i have become . i couldnt have been happier when my mother came to Adelaide to see me graduate, my parents got along so well and life was great but always in the back of my mind i had this itchy feeling that something will happen all good things come to an end right.. well it did i got what i wanted well atleast what i thought i wanted ... Its then that i got the news that my nana, the last grandparent i had alive was in hospital. My nana was my best friend i used to go shopping with her i used go to her house and we would watch neighbours read tv weekly and have cake. i loved those moments as i already how hard it was to lose a grand parent and i knew that those times i'd need to treasure them. well i do and now its all i have left memories of her as she left this world last friday 09.01.09.. i came to the hospital one last time to see her out of breath, laying there her pale face was cold, her mouth open like her soul escaped through it, but she looked peaceful, comfortable and free..yet another part of my heart goes crashing down as i am so upset of this lost .. But what can i say apart from i'll always be thinking of her no matter how hard it would be to have a life without her and also say hello to my grand ma and grand pa as she finally gets to meet them..

Amicitiae nostrae memoriam spero sempiternam fore -I hope that the memory of our friendship will be everlasting.


Its the end of this chapter a new one is opening and as terryfying as it is to step into the new chapter i know that i'll be ok and strong to face biggger challenges ahead of me:)

WELL DONE TO ALL SENIORS OF 2008 ALL AROUND THE WORLD

i can't believe i wrote three articles in one week that shows how bored i am and how i'm not concentrating on my work anyway the reason i'm sick with a big fat cold.. that won't go away can you believe that? anyway as most of my close friends would know something tragic happened to me recently i lost one the most important people in my life my grand mother, not even a year after the death of my grand father, grand ma had to go with him.. i guess i'm mostly affected because i wasnt expecting her to go so soon i mean she was only 69.. she was very warm, GENEROUS, forgiving and her only flaw was that she worked too much.. she worked herself off like a slave even if she has TWO maids.. She is the only one after my mother who would how i was ... i remember when my mum was working in Rodrigues for a few weeks i stayed at hers there was not one day she would brush my hair and braid into the most unstylish hairdo, put like a whole bottle of coconut oil in my hair then make sure my uniform was well ironed and clean..she would also make sure i ate all my breakfast and ofcourse washed my plate afterwards..there was not one day i didnt wish i was in my own house doing my own things but still no matter how embarassing my hair do was or how much i hated each time i switched the tele on and heard her scream out "NIvenitaaaa" i will always cherish those moments our little talks her always complaining about how her maids steal her money and dont do their work properly or how my aunty annoys her or how she is gonna leave and live in a convent .. all i know is that she was a great woman in her last years i did take her for granted i didnt spend enough time with her and that is something i will always regret but i know she would want me to move on and that is what i will do.. but i'm leaving my memories of her behind the good and the bad i will always love no matter what she will always be part of my life and my everything and wherever she is now i know she is much happier as she can look after us all.. this is me saying good bye to her so that she knows how much she meant to me and that i'm sorry and i will never forget her.. I love you mamy chumam